Intentional Living

I look down and cannot help but stare in amazement at the perfect little creature swaddled in my arms.  A little button nose, sweet sleepy eyes, hands held in tightly closed fists.  I watch.  I wait.  He sleeps.  Content.  Wrapped in love.  I keep watching.  What else is there for me to do?  I’ve been banned to the couch until my six week check-up.  I’m getting good at watching.  I keep watching.  Perfection.  Right here in my arms.  I might have missed it if I weren’t on bedrest.  Did I miss this with Joseph and William?  I don’t know.  I can’t remember because the early days with them seem like a blur now.  I rushed with them.  Rushed to get back into the swing of things.  Rushed to see their first real smile; to hear their first real laugh; to get into some kind of routine.  This time I have nothing to rush for.  I have 27 more days until I can leave my post on the couch (yep, Joseph and I made a countdown chain to track Mommy’s healing).  I can fill those 27 days with busywork.  Searching the internet; making lists; compiling homeschool curriculum ideas.  Or I can fill those 27 days with intentional living.  I can savor each moment of this precious little newborn because who knows if this will be my last.  There are no guarantees in life.  Daxson and I plan to have more babies, but what if God has a different plan?  What if this is my last chance to just watch.  To just wait.  To just be.  I can spend the next 27 days trying to keep Joseph and William entertained while I read a book or spend time mindlessly clicking away on my laptop or I could spend the next 27 days watching them…watching as Joseph and William immerse themselves in imaginary play, finding ways to make it through a restless summer; watching as childhood unfolds before them.  I choose to spend my next 27 days watching.  Watching.  Waiting.  There is no rush here.  Just precious time.  I plan to watch as that time unfolds.

Intentional living…seems to be a hot topic this summer.  Elizabeth is contemplating it In the Heart of her Home; Sarah is thinking about it Amongst Lovely Things.  Now I’m thinking about it.  Maybe you will spend a little time contemplating how to live each day with intention.  There are no guarantees.  No promise of another summer.  No promise of time.  So go and make your list.  Your list for this summer of intentional living.  It might look more like Sarah’s or Elizabeth’s…theirs are filled with beautiful, creative endeavors.  Or maybe, just maybe your list will look more like mine.  My list is quite short.  Just one thing on it.  Watch.

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